I realise that when I write I seem to portray myself to be far more negative and/or depressed than I truly am. (I guess that’s what makes me a writer.)
I never meant to worry anyone, trust me, I am just fine.
I have not been sulking, I have not been crying, I have simply been trying to find a way to deal with every obstacle put before me.
Yesterday I had three successive failures. The first failure was missing my audition after days of excitement and anticipation. I was let down yet again by one of my UCF friends and in the end all of my excitement was wasted. What was I auditioning for? A group of agents, evidently, brought together by a company that I won’t disclose.
Before leaving we had decided to do some research to see what we were getting into and saw a bunch of sour blog posts by people who call it a scam, and a few others who said that it was perfectly legit. Nonetheless, I never make my decisions based on what people tell me. Maybe I am stubborn, maybe foolish, but I do like to see things for myself. (Good and bad are relative. Excuse me if I do not trust your judgment.) Besides, what did I have to lose?
In the end we decided to go to the later audition so that she could go to class and I could still get to audition. Meanwhile she was in class, I got to watch my team lose to InterMilan after falling apart in the second half. I will admit, Inter played very well, however this is a two leg finale and I am more than confident that Barca will come back from the 2 goal lead in the second leg next week.
At the end of the match, I discovered that she did not in effect go to class. She left my room under the pretense and somehow ended up at target. (Hello! Did you not realise I missed my audition for you? So you can go to class. Did you guys take a field trip to target? I think not…) Needless to say, I was a little ticked. Two days in a row.
She was on a roll.
It did not end there. My third failure was Fabian. I agreed to take Applebee to Walmart after her 4 20 class, only to pick her up and look down to see Fabian overheating. Much like Michael Jackson, I somehow felt as though he was invincible and nothing could go wrong. I sometimes fail to realise that he is already four years old and sometimes just needs a little extra TLC.
Things always happen for a reason, right? Maybe I was not meant to go audition.
All things considered I think I handled my day quite well. I think by far my biggest problem is that I am not preoccupied enough. If I had more to do on a daily basis, and more people to talk to and hang out with, I would have far less room for complaints.
Instead I sit around and analyse. I figure my readers would be much more entertained with my writing about a problem than ranting on about how wonderful and amazing my life is; which by the way, it is.